The jokes of the moment! Part 2

Yesterday, while discussing with a nurse, he reaffirmed that the morale is 50% of the recovery.

So, here is a new selec­tion of jokes picked up here and there. We hope to be able to par­ti­ci­pate in this 50%. There is some­thing for eve­ryone. Do not hesi­tate to share them!

 

 

They are two medi­cal stu­dents having a drink at a café. One of them notices a pas­ser-by who is wal­king hesi­tant­ly and cautiously:
‑Here, I bet you that this guy suf­fers from hemorrhoids!
‑Are you cra­zy? This guy has a blen­no, it is obvious!
‑Well we are going to ask him, he is going to put us in agreement.
They get up and approach the poor guy:
‑Hel­lo sir, excuse us, we are medi­cal stu­dents. I bet you were suf­fe­ring from hemor­rhoids, my friend thinks it’s a clap. So what do you real­ly have?
‑Well, you see, all three of us were wrong. I thought it was just a fart…
It’s a woman going to the doctor:
‑Doc­tor, some­thing weird is hap­pe­ning to me. When I take off my bra, my breasts go up!
‑Oh well, let’s see…
The lady undresses and takes off her bra. Indeed, her two breasts go up.
‑Wow, that’s real­ly strange. And does it do that to you all the time?
‑Yes, Doctor.
She puts her bra back on and then takes it off again, and again, the breasts go up.
‑Yes, yes, yes, I see what it is…
‑Do you know what it is?
‑No, but in any case, it is contagious.
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jesus sur apple
You want more? Then let’s go for some more jokes!

A good lady gets a tape­worm, she goes to her doctor:
‑Doc­tor, what should I do?
‑I have a new Bel­gian treat­ment. Come back to see me tomor­row with a can of peas and a Mars.
The next day, Madam is at the appointment.
‑Very well, Madam, undress and lean forward.
The doc­tor puts the peas in the lady’s bot­tom and finishes with the Mars.
‑That’s it for today, come back tomor­row with the same thing.
The next day, the same thing hap­pe­ned, and it las­ted for a month. One day the doc­tor says to the woman:
‑The treat­ment ends tomor­row. Come back with the peas and a hammer.
So the woman comes back and the doc­tor does the pea maneu­ver one last time, then tells the woman:
‑Pass me the ham­mer, then above all, do not move!
After a few moments, the tape­worm comes out shouting:
‑What about my Mars?
And sprotch the worm.

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